NOSTALGIA TIME! Installment 1

(Note: Considering that there's been a lot of talk lately about the FCC cracking down on "indecency" and "obscenity", especially after Janet Jackson's Boobiegate incident and all that, I've decided that, rather than repeating myself, I'd post this rant from a long-extinct site I had up several years ago. So here it is, where somehow, comments made in 1997 have newfound relevance in 2005. Go figure.- MP)


Ruminations and Accusations

CHAPTER 1.This Censorship Shit is Really Fucked Up!

WHEN IN THE COURSE OF HUMAN EVENTS, it becomes annoying when fuckheads who somehow get elected to public office start trying to tell people like me that mere words, usually being vulgar references to sexual acts, excrement, and male and female genitalia used in many creative alternate ways, are obscene and threatening to the well-being of our children, but that, say, for example, Freddie Krueger or Michael Myers disemboweling and dismembering people on movie screens or the Starr Report or ignoring the dangers of the use of methyl bromide in heavily populated areas does not, one can only conclude that these aforementioned lawmakers have their heads firmly and permanently lodged in their sphincters.

I'll cut to the chase. The reason so many of these parents nowadays are pushing for "decency" measures in all walks of media life isn't because there's this sudden proliferation of nasty material everywhere. That level of "adult" information and entertainment and whatnot is about the same level of obscenity as 10, even 20 years ago, actually. The real reason that these parents are campaigning so hard for censorship and control is that...

THEY DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE TIME IT REQUIRES TO SUPERVISE THEIR FUCKIN' KIDS!!!

Yup, ever since the beast Ronald 666 ascended to the throne back in '80, we've been bombarded with these right-wing diatribes about how we need to bring "traditional family values" back into governmental policy and American lifestyle in general, and things like unmarried people humpy-dumpin' each other and gays getting married and some 12-year old girl who got raped by her brother choosing to have an abortion are unacceptable abominations which must be stopped immediately at all costs.

But on the ass-end of this deal, the same fools who propagate this mentality want to have their cake and eat it too. Why? Because they also want to retain their over mortgaged homes and bloated expensive late model vehicles and over-usury-dependent lifestyles, that in all practical terms, they KNEW that they had a snowball's chance in Hell of affording in any realistic view. And HOW do they perceive to pull this off? By throwing their kids into fuckin' day care centers until they're old enough to become "latchkey kids", whilst both parental units work their asses off 24-7 to prove to the world that they can be good parents and provide all the necessary GOODS and SERVICES for their family. And on top of that, be able to drag the whole family to service every Sunday!

However, in order to maintain this lifestyle, they have to cut back on certain traditional mainstays- such as time with their kids! Oh, sure, once in a while there's a ballgame or a school play to attend or a trip to the zoo or the miniature golf course, but that takes a back seat to the fact that you need to prove to the world that you're not one of these leeching welfare ingrates sucking off the tax dollars, never mind that the multi-national that you worked for got enough tax breaks to pay NOTHING on the millions they profited for the past few years or so! NO, you've got an image as a good wholesome family head to uphold, and gosh darn it, the world may not owe you a living, but it certainly owes you free babysitting! Now, where, I repeat, where the fuck does this mixed up confused logic come from?

My bottom line is this... I did not encourage you to join genitalia with the opposite sex, combine DNA info, and reproduce. That was YOUR choice. I chose NOT to do so. I am NOT your male nanny, and my behavior on MY personal web pages is, quite frankly, NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BEESWAX.

I know as well as the next folk that there are some very sick motherfuckers in this world out to get kids for their own perverted use. I despise the actions of these pedophilic miscreants as much as any card carrying Christian Coalition groupie. But blocking information en masse, ignoring the real methods and means, not only will do nothing to protect kids, it will simply ignore the objectives they're attempting to address. The best way to protect your children is the same on the Internet or on TV as on the streets: INFORMATION. Information on what is right for viewing and who is right to associate with. Give them information on what to do if a stranger tries to communicate with you, whether in the chat room or on the street. Hey, even good old fashioned GUILT. If the parents aren't there, the kid's been taught about right and wrong well enough so that Mom and Dad's eyes are drillin' through their heads if they know that they could be using poor judgment!

And besides, do you really think pornography causes teen sex and pregnancy anyway? What REALLY causes it is horny teenage kids of opposite genders getting together and being STUPID and UNTHINKING! I mean, to quote the average '90s teen, "Well, DUH!"

In closing, I would like to say, in regards to criticism that my Website material is inappropriate for your younger children, let me give you a quote which my dear old Dad said when I was just a teenager my own self: "Well, if you don't like it here, then get the fuck out of my house!"