NOT-SO-FAKE TALES OF SAN FRANCISCO. PLEASE. JUST FOR ONCE.

So. I've been hearing a lot of this jibber jabber lately about how Sacramento needs to become a "destination city", or some shit. Well, consider the fact that one of the most desired destination cities in the world, San Francisco, is a relatively short hop up the road. I did, considering that I visit there fairly often (and recently), and I've got some advice for Sacramento as a result of my research. And that advisory sums up as follows:

Find another fuckin' goal, Sacramento.

There's a motley assortment of philistines, village idiots, retired debutramps, and hipster Oompa-Loompas puttering around Sacramento nowadays. All of these fools think that a city's cultural style and substance can be spewed out willy-nilly overnight with a trendy restaurant du jour here and a flashy gimmick event there, sprinkled like pixie dust over a white rice bed of cookie cutter condos and corporate chain retailers. Just let the developers in, let them work their special brand of magic and, voila! After barely a year or two of any work, the online travel sites will be BLOWIN'. UP. With people trying to get a travel package bargain to SACraMENto!

Yeah. Right.

Look. Get something straight. It takes originality and character to create and maintain a great city life, and it's not only something that takes time to develop, it's something that almost defies description, and just is, or isn't.

Sacramento is a great place to live in, and has plenty of quality within its city limits. I'm not going to go into detail or name names, because if you need me to do that, then YOU need to get outside more often and check out what's out there.

We need to concentrate on the livable strengths of our fair city, and improve them. As far as the problems, with crime or whatever, welcome to the big city. Shit like that will need to be dealt with anyway. But as far as overall quality of life goes, please don't keep repeating the mistake of America Live and the like. Just quit. Seriously. And if you like shit like that, just leave.

And stay out. Seriously.