What's so outrageous about these kooky folks standing outside of the high schools around town with the anti-gay protest signs?

Don't you heathens understand?

These people are just trying to prove that Christians are sodomy experts.

See? That's all there is to it.

Other than that, wake me up when Fred Phelps brings his hyper-homophobic ass into town. After all, anyone who's slimebrained enough to hold up signs proclaiming "GOD HATES FAGS" at Matthew Shepard's funeral is just chompin' at the bit to get in on this one. Hell, as we speak he's probably gassin' up the school bus for the ride in from Topeka. C'mon, all you Mother Russia refugees stirrin' up this shit, invite the not- so- Reverend in with open arms and show your true colors, why doncha? Then let's see how much publicity you're going to milk off this sorry waste of news print and airtime. Big Fat Hint: it won't be the kind of PR you're looking for.