I'VE MOVED, AND WHAT'S MORE, I WANT MY DEPOSIT REFUNDED IN FULL

Dear Yahoo,

I sincerely apologize.

Had I known that my decision to pull out of GeoCities and (finally!) open up shop on my very own website (www.michaelpsycho.com)would negatively influence Microsoft's decision to buy you out, I may have waited at least a day or two to say bye-bye and start to redirect folks from the old place to the new one. Or maybe not. Well, probably not.

Anyhoo. What's done is done and I gotta admit, after our 10 years(!) together I just can't figure out why I haven't done this sooner. It's not like I've been a brokedick for the past few years. Actually, I couldn't believe how cheap domain registration and site hosting has gotten nowadays. Oh, sure, I'll admit that I might look back with bittersweet nostalgia at your funny lil' GeoCities quirks.

Like the times I tried to put MP3s of my music (or even high-resolution pics of my paintings) on my site, only for my visitors to be greeted with a "Sorry, This Site Is Temporarily Unavailable" page instead on my usual mainpage layout. Yeah, I must have been acting pretty selfish, considering that the whopping 4 megabytes of data transfer that you offer GeoCities Free users must be thought of as a pretty magnanimous act on your part.

And I must say now that I might miss those hilarious attempts to place targeted advertising in that cheesy embedded frame only occupying the entire right end of my pages from top to bottom! Why, just checking my old page to see what pops up, it offered me the complete seasons of ER 1-13 on 72 DVDs and another ad was trying to entice me to "Find out when designer bags & shoes go on sale in your size."

Wow, you folks sure do know my demographic, DON-cha now?

Yeah, yeah, I know, I got what I paid for right through all of those years. And apparently Microsoft changed their mind about what they were getting if they had paid for it. Don't lose heart, Yahoo. Plenty of people still like stuff like your email and such and maybe Google will make an attempt to suck you up in due time. IMHO, I would consider that kind of takeover attempt not just merely logical but a match made in Heaven. Because, just like your good fortune in the previous decade, I have just as much of a hard time trying to figure out why the fuck they made all of that money in this decade.