UPDATE: MAYBE I AM ACTUALLY RUNNING FOR GOVERNOR!

It's a great lil' service, this here Internet. In only a matter of days, I've gone from making a wise ass blog remark about running for governor of California, to actually running. At least that's what my esteemed colleague ToneDog666, a.k.a. the blogmeister of The Evil I Spread, is trying to encourage me to do. Now Tony and I go back a whiles, and although it's been years and we've only been catching up recently, I can tell you 2 things:

1. ToneDog was always the best kind of friend and this kind of gesture shows just what kind of a guy he is.

2. This gesture is actually something that I've always known as "fucking with my shit", and hey, only good friends could get away with doing this to me.

Anyway, ToneDog emailed me the following (as accurately posted on his blog):

"Below is the actual email I sent him, let hope this is one of those historic moments and not just more shit on the net.
"Lets do it, I will help anyway I can. They can do a lot worse. We can have a fundraiser for the $3500 and get bands and celebs to back you. You are always bitching about whats wrong now its time to put up or shut up. And even if you don't make it very far think of all the chaos and disruption we could cause while getting you there, and just think if for some fucked up twist of fate you did make it.....god help anyone who is not on your side.
Gov. Michael Psycho. "

Gee, looks he's really got me over a barrel, eh?

Okay, if you're going to taunt me, at least do it with a knowledge of the election laws. So let me show you how it's done. And I'll also show you the part about knowing the election laws too.

OK, campaign manager - Here's how it works. If more than $1000.00 is raised for any campaign, we have to open a bank account and go through all kinds of bullshit regulations and reporting (which is state law. And that's included in the same state information link you were reading.) Does that mean that I can't run? No, Shawn Eldredge ran for mayor of Sacramento while avoiding that limit.

Does this mean that I can't pay the 3500 dollars? Nope, I can draft a cashiers' check at my bank tomorrow and walk across the park to Debra Bowen's office and file. BUT... here's where you come in...

I'm speaking to you directly now, T. Since I'm willing to put up, that is, as in put up my money out of pocket, you put YOUR promise up where your keyboard fingers are and collect the 10,000 registered voter signatures to put me on the ballot in lieu of the $3500.00. THEN, if you can prove to me that all of the signatures are valid, you will save me the 3500 bucks. And I won't have to spend it. That's fair enough. Hell, back when I was petitioning for pay I averaged about 35 cents a signature and collected WAY more than that. By the math, .35 times 10000 is a grand total of $3500.00. If that isn't a fair deal I don't know what is.

Oh, yeah, they also have to be collected and ready on legally acceptable petition pages. I know a bit about that stuff too, so if you need any help with that, ask me for advice anytime.

So that's how it has to be done. No seriously. I'm willing to roll with it. If the Church of the SubGenius started off as a joke, so can my gubernatorial campaign. And like it's been said, "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke", right? This COULD be a lot of fun.

Go for it, Tony. You've got until probably February of 2010. That's like, less than 17 signatures a day, starting today (based on the 2006 deadline date!)

Now get out there in front of Costco and shove a pen in people's faces.